Hi
I have just joined after reading discussions over the last few weeks. This forum seems a great place to receive advice from people who understand.
Over the last two months I have noticed a rapid deterioration in my mum. She is 86, always been very astute and lives alone. At Christmas she started saying that everything on the tv was a repeat, they were giving out last nights weather and all the presenters/actors were wearing the same clothes. This has now extended to books and the newspaper. She has already seen/read every tv programme, book and paper. Tonight she said she’d put the radio on and that was the same. I can see she’s very depressed because she says she’s nothing to live for now. She is aware that this is happening and that it is not normal. Any ideas on how to overcome the tv/reading issues?
She has also become very forgetful, sometimes agitated, looks quite vacant, and is making endless notes and lists at home. At times she appears fine, she isn’t so confused that she doesn’t know people and is able to use her phone to ring me but I’m worried sick that she’s alone at home. It’s also distressing because she is aware this is happening to her. She’s not eating very much at all but I do take something most days to tempt her. I have researched the deja vu she’s experiencing and have read it is quite common in people with dementia.
I suggest every day that we see the doctor, but she won’t entertain it-at all. I know it would be the best thing to do but I cannot get her to agree. It wouldn’t work to have her invited in for a check, the doctor did that as a matter of routine and she refused to go.
What I would like to know is what do I do in a crisis? Do I try and persuade her to stay at my house? Involve a care agency? Although she’d hate that. She’s always been adamant she’d like to stay in her home and as long as she’s safe I’d like to respect her wishes. Or would her gp chat with me just to give advice? Her decline has been quite rapid, she does have heart failure and I wonder whether this is vascular dementia? Can that be rapid?
I’m sorry this is such a long post, just trying to get it all in at once! Thank you in advance.
I have just joined after reading discussions over the last few weeks. This forum seems a great place to receive advice from people who understand.
Over the last two months I have noticed a rapid deterioration in my mum. She is 86, always been very astute and lives alone. At Christmas she started saying that everything on the tv was a repeat, they were giving out last nights weather and all the presenters/actors were wearing the same clothes. This has now extended to books and the newspaper. She has already seen/read every tv programme, book and paper. Tonight she said she’d put the radio on and that was the same. I can see she’s very depressed because she says she’s nothing to live for now. She is aware that this is happening and that it is not normal. Any ideas on how to overcome the tv/reading issues?
She has also become very forgetful, sometimes agitated, looks quite vacant, and is making endless notes and lists at home. At times she appears fine, she isn’t so confused that she doesn’t know people and is able to use her phone to ring me but I’m worried sick that she’s alone at home. It’s also distressing because she is aware this is happening to her. She’s not eating very much at all but I do take something most days to tempt her. I have researched the deja vu she’s experiencing and have read it is quite common in people with dementia.
I suggest every day that we see the doctor, but she won’t entertain it-at all. I know it would be the best thing to do but I cannot get her to agree. It wouldn’t work to have her invited in for a check, the doctor did that as a matter of routine and she refused to go.
What I would like to know is what do I do in a crisis? Do I try and persuade her to stay at my house? Involve a care agency? Although she’d hate that. She’s always been adamant she’d like to stay in her home and as long as she’s safe I’d like to respect her wishes. Or would her gp chat with me just to give advice? Her decline has been quite rapid, she does have heart failure and I wonder whether this is vascular dementia? Can that be rapid?
I’m sorry this is such a long post, just trying to get it all in at once! Thank you in advance.