Hello, I'm new here. I just found this site this afternoon whilst googling for info on LPAs, and I think there is lots of useful stuff on here for me. My Dad, 90, has vascular dementia, diagnosed about 2 years ago and really clear to us, his family, for about 4 years. We are lucky, there are enough of us to spread the caring load most of the time, and we are over the initial shock now, it was scary at the beginning. My mum, 89, is his carer, and she has had a very hard time coming to terms with it, and will not use the word dementia. She will not accept any form of help other than from me and my siblings, and this does cause problems. There do actually seem to be some quite good services in our area, but unfortunately they come with the word dementia attached, so Mum will not access any of the carer support or day services we have found locally. Dad can't be left on his own now and has gone walkabout from home and when out a few times; he doesn't know who we are really, but he's always pleased to see us! I've read some of the threads on here and I recognise some of the issues we have already been through especially with regard to giving up driving, realising he doesn't know who we are anymore, and having to take a step back from caring, despite feeling very guilty, when my parents won't access any other help. We are I'm afraid, now waiting for some inevitable disaster to happen before they will take any outside help. My worst fear is that my Mum will have to go into hospital and we will be faced with looking for a care home for Dad in an emergency situation, rather than being able to take our time and plan for the future.
It's good to find a place where so many people are going through similar things!