I also love candles, Aisling, but don't keep them for occasions. There's something very comforting about candles. It's almost like company that doesn't talk back to you!
In Winter, I often have five or six lighting in the living room. Makes it very cozy too, you'd be surprised how much heat they throw out!
Special occasions will always be hard. Especially, I've found, as others have moved on, and no longer think of it. Or they might, but it doesn't mean as much to them. I always take my mum out for coffee or lunch on my dad's birthday and their wedding anniversary, and take flowers to his grave for her as she's not very mobile. I take
myself out for William's special days, and buy myself some flowers. So, treat yourself, if you can, Aisling, in honour of T's birthday.