Dad just been diagnosed with Alzheimers....my story..

[Floss64]

After briefly reading other posts on here , my story is very familiar to lots of you.I first noticed something was amiss with my 87 year old dad when there was lots of out of date food in the fridge.I put it down to the fact that I was encouraging him to buy ready meals , because i was worried more about his mobility and bending down to the oven.I told myself that he wasnt used to looking at dates on such food and that is why he was buying a weeks worth of meals , all with the same date on.I stood in his kitchen trying to explain sell by dates to him (which he clearly used to understand , on his bread etc) and realised that he really didn't know what I was talking about.

Another time, back in Aug, he wanted to give my daughter some money for her eighteenth , and didnt recognise the notes.The same week, he couldnt remember how to unlock his back door.I colour coded the keys so he could see which key fitted where.

Things came to a head, when the GP suggested he refer him to the memory clinic, where the diagnosis was given.I dont think dad heard the doctor, and I have kept it that way.Doc told me dad could no longer drive.Dad has diabetes too, and i have told him that he can't drive because of that.I really dont want to tell him.....unless he asks.I dont want him to get upset.Am I doing the right thing?

Dad still makes his own meals; we bought an extra freezer and he only eats good quality (well the best we can find) frozen food which doesnt need too much fiddling about with timings (eg nine full minutes, rather than 4.5 then 4.5)So far all seems to be ok, although I have been very strict with his routine; i wake him up by phone at nine and then remind him to eat and take meds by phone at 12 and 5 (I work most days ).He is having a ss assessment for someone to go in and give him his meds next week, as this wont work long term, obviously.

My dad seems happy and content at the minute, but that could be for my benefit and we could both be playing the game of not letting on how each other is feeling.

I love him so much and it breaks my heart to see him deteriorating..He uses his computer to watch Tv, go on face book and you tube , he listens to jazz music , and I have bought him aeroplane and car magazines as he cant concentrate on books any more.

Thanks for listening to my first post

Flossx

 

[1mindy]

I think it unlikely your dad is playing your game or just pretending to make you happy ,they are the thought processes of someone without dementia. He may actually be content. He can still do things for himself and has the capacity for music and tv. Long may it last. You sound so caring ,he's a very lucky dad.

 

[Floss64]

I think it unlikely your dad is playing your game or just pretending to make you happy ,they are the thought processes of someone without dementia. He may actually be content. He can still do things for himself and has the capacity for music and tv. Long may it last. You sound so caring ,he's a very lucky dad.

Thanks for your reply Mindy,this is all new to me and he seems to have deteriorated quite quickly.I took him to marks and Spencer cafe today for a cup of coffee ...and we had a great conversation about the directions to the place i was going to this afternoon.It was a route he used to ride on his motor bike ...and he could remember it.

I tend to just talk about the past with him and am starting a memory book , to keep him stimulated...all seems to be going ok, but i am under no illusion that it will stay the same for long.

My dad has taught me many things thoughout my life, but just recently he has taught me how to be patient, something I never thought I could be.