I'm confused

[candiedsonia]

I feel so guilty looking after my Mum. She does not think that there is anything wrong with her.
She lives alone with her cat and dog.
Walks the dog in the park every day.

My brother and I go every day separately and take her out to eat as she does not eat at home and has been malnourished twice I last 3 years.

She manages on her own really well.

She picks up dog poo with her bare hands and when she had toilet problems herself gets it all over her hands and toilet and handle etc but does not clean up after herself as tho she doesn't notice.

She will wash her hands properly, but may smell as hse would have toucherd her clothes.

She looks really pretty and young as she is a 76 year old hippy.

Last week I found out that a 30yrs old man from the park had seduced her and is sleeping with her round the house.
I called the police who went round, but has she had amazing verbal skills they could do nothing.
Because I called the police the Adult Care services want to assess her. (Up to now no one other than family has been involved.)
I have been meaning to do this for ages, but because she does not think there is anything wrong I couldn't do it to her.

I'm now worried about what happens next, because she is so like a child and happy in her denial.

I'm confused, upset and at end of my tether.

 

[balloo]

I feel so guilty looking after my Mum. She does not think that there is anything wrong with her.
She lives alone with her cat and dog.
Walks the dog in the park every day.

My brother and I go every day separately and take her out to eat as she does not eat at home and has been malnourished twice I last 3 years.

She manages on her own really well.

She picks up dog poo with her bare hands and when she had toilet problems herself gets it all over her hands and toilet and handle etc but does not clean up after herself as tho she doesn't notice.

She will wash her hands properly, but may smell as hse would have toucherd her clothes.

She looks really pretty and young as she is a 76 year old hippy.

Last week I found out that a 30yrs old man from the park had seduced her and is sleeping with her round the house.
I called the police who went round, but has she had amazing verbal skills they could do nothing.
Because I called the police the Adult Care services want to assess her. (Up to now no one other than family has been involved.)
I have been meaning to do this for ages, but because she does not think there is anything wrong I couldn't do it to her.

I'm now worried about what happens next, because she is so like a child and happy in her denial.

I'm confused, upset and at end of my tether.

she needs looking after this is a safe guarding issue. she may be happy in her world but this is not right for her she needs to be kept safe . sound as though she needs full time care or for her to come and live with one of you .

 

[canary]

Hi Sonia.
In my opinion, you did the right thing calling the police as I think social services need to know about the situation. Your mum is a vulnerable adult and you know nothing about this man. OK it might be genuine, but I would be suspicious about his motives. Your mum might be happy, but she also needs to be kept safe.
Im sorry I cant offer more advice.

 

[Grannie G]

Well said canary.

It`s lovely your mum is happy candiedsonia but she is also at risk. She is at risk of being exploited and she is at risk of physical harm.

 

[candiedsonia]

Thank YOu

Well said canary.

It`s lovely your mum is happy candiedsonia but she is also at risk. She is at risk of being exploited and she is at risk of physical harm.

Thank you to all of you.

I have to bite bullet and not be so soft. I have CCTV in the house and he has just left, so I'll now go and pick her up to take her to the meeting.

Here goes..................

 

[starryuk]

Your mum sounds delightful, Sonia and you seem to be doing such a good job of caring for her.

About the man. It is a really difficult one. Have you actually met this man? Can you and your brother warn him off? Do you have Power of Attorney, which could help you talk to the bank to make sure he is not taking her money? Perhaps you could remove her valuables and significant paperwork from the house on some pretext? What a worry for you. Your mum needs to be kept safe, though, she is vulnerable at risk.

It was a good thing to call the police and to make Adult Services aware of the situation. Good luck at the meeting.

 

[stanleypj]

A very difficult situation candiedsonia but you have certainly done the right thing.

As she has amazing verbal skills, is it possible to talk to her about the situation at all?