My mum is sitting there crying calling for her mum and saying she doesnt want to stay here anymore i have lived with her for years and done everything i cane for her i know she might be fine tomorrow i dont know what to and she hasnt been out of the house due to anxiety for 18months dont know hiw to stimulate her and she sometimes appears like nothing can comfort her
Dear Elaine,
Oh dear. My Mum, aged 92, is the same. She can have periods of depression, which come and go, but is a classic Sundowner. At 4p.m. every day until whenever she stops (usually 4 hours minimum), we know we're in for it. At these times she will cry for her mother, pester us incessantly to arrange taxi's and ferries to take her "home", although she has lived with my wife and I for 20 months. She becomes very confused and demanding (to see long dead relatives) and now, recently after two further T.I.A.'s, aggressive when we don't do what she wants, weeping and blaming us. She cannot be distracted, such is her agitation. Her distress is most distressing because we've found nothing that can relieve her unless it is a visit by her remaining sister (aged 96 and she lives 400 miles away).
We've spoken with her G.P. and have arranged to have both Social Services and the local Mental Health Trust come out to make a further assessment. Maybe there's a medication. An American friend of mine has suggested Melatonin, which is naturally produced when we go to sleep but it's unavailable in the UK.
We simply know this is a very tough place for you. Our local Alzheimer's Group have a befriending service. Sometimes a visit by one of their members can be helpful. Just make sure your G.P. knows what is happening.
I hope this helps
