Hi, Sarah, I was off the boards for a few days and just read your post from last week and thought I'd respond.
How are you, and how is your mother, and if you've seen her since last week, I hope that went okay. It was reassuring to hear that when you saw your Mum last week she wasn't quite as difficult and upset. I do hope the mental health team come to see her soon and maybe a different medication/combination will help. You're right, it would be no good for her to be at home alone, upset, anxious, and did I mention, alone.
Thank you for asking after my mother. I feel a little guilty confessing that I haven't seen her since Easter. Only a little guilty. My husband has been to see her, though, and he reports that she is doing fine, and maybe even is a little bit more accepting of her situation (being in the care home) and that she even made a comment about how maybe we should sell her place since it didn't make sense to pay for two places. That's convenient, because of course we are cleaning out her place to put it up for sale, to help pay for her care! I realise that all too soon, she won't remember where she lived, but while she does, it would be much nicer to not have her screaming at me that I kidnapped her and sold her home and stole her money et cetera.
I will see her this weekend and I cannot say I am looking forward to it. I'm always a little on edge about how she is going to behave and just waiting for the nasty comments (always out of earshot of my husband and anyone else), although they are not as bad as they were.
I do keep in touch with the staff and other than some minor physical things (she has bad arthritis and the weather here hasn't been helpful, so they've been trying to adjust her medications to help with the pain) there have been no problems from their end. So that is reassuring.
I do wonder about the link with dementia and anxiety, though. For the past 2-3 years my mother has suffered from terrible anxiety, which was new for her (depression in the past, yes, but not anxiety) and now I'm wondering if it wasn't more the dementia and less an actual anxiety disorder. I'm not saying she wasn't anxious, but I wonder if somehow the dementia was causing it. Because ever since the hospital stay in January-February, she has has almost no signs or symptoms of the anxiety. Maybe not being alone and not having to be responsible has relieved it? Or maybe on some level she knew she needed help and now she's getting it? Maybe others have some insight or experience with this?
Sorry, didn't mean to digress so much!