Four weeks today, Mother`s Day, my devoted Mum slipped away peacefully, a beautiful passing. Two weeks now since the celebration of her life service. I still remain strong and occassionally niagra falls breaks through, but I`m in a state of mind now trying to take it all in. Everything I was terrified, frightened of happening has now been and gone. I was srong and calm. Was it a dream. the pain is eased as she didn`t live with us, nor was unable to come home to us for Christmas and family ocassions for the past 4 years. I relive the last few days of her life, sleeping and waiting, I watched her slip away peacefully, I visited her the day before her funeral and yet - was it a dream. I always talked about having to change our "mindset" as Mum declined, saying "goodbye" to another aspect of her life/personality. She remained happy, affectionate to everyone, gentle. But changing the "mindset" now seems a little more difficult as there is no physical body to see any changes, the physical is no longer and this is perhaps why. I used to visit her daily and help her at lunchtimes and latterly with her personal care, but I`ve been so busy over the past four weeks, perhaps I have`nt had time to sit in the quietness and recover.
I found this on a card in Sandringham church last week which is a great help and maybe to others coming to terms:
Miss me, But let me Go
When I come to the end of the road
and the sun has set for me,
I want no tears in a gloom-filled room.
Why cry for a soul set free?
Miss me a little, but not too much
and not with you head bowed low
Remember the love that once we shared,
Miss me, but let me go.
This is a journey we all must take
and each must take alone;
It`s all part of God`s perfect plan,
a step on the road to home.
When you are lonely and sick of heart
go to the friends we know.
Bury your sorrows in doing good,
Miss me, but let me go.
Just wanted to share my thoughts today. Perhaps there are others like me feeling the same. I don`t feel guilty,I have no regrets, I didn`t everything I could to ensure she was well cared for, its a very strange feeling but I know time heals and when the tears flow, we must allow it to happen, without questioning and move on...
Heather xxx
I found this on a card in Sandringham church last week which is a great help and maybe to others coming to terms:
Miss me, But let me Go
When I come to the end of the road
and the sun has set for me,
I want no tears in a gloom-filled room.
Why cry for a soul set free?
Miss me a little, but not too much
and not with you head bowed low
Remember the love that once we shared,
Miss me, but let me go.
This is a journey we all must take
and each must take alone;
It`s all part of God`s perfect plan,
a step on the road to home.
When you are lonely and sick of heart
go to the friends we know.
Bury your sorrows in doing good,
Miss me, but let me go.
Just wanted to share my thoughts today. Perhaps there are others like me feeling the same. I don`t feel guilty,I have no regrets, I didn`t everything I could to ensure she was well cared for, its a very strange feeling but I know time heals and when the tears flow, we must allow it to happen, without questioning and move on...
Heather xxx