Need some help please

[jennybea]

Hi my mam has been acting strange for a while eg. forgetting what she s been talking about not knowing where she s been. She now is saying that a member of my family is stealing from her. She phones me up day and night and has started to be very aggressive I dont know how to cope I dont know what I should do, she refuses to go to gp and they say they cant help unless she see s them. I also have a severly disabled husband a mentaly ill daughter aged 22 and a 10 year old grandaughter living with me they are not coping any advise on how I can help them...

[nitram]

Contact her GP and say that you are worried about your mam, you consider her to be vulnerable and might come to harm - forget to light gas hob, wander outside,...

Although the GP can't talk about her to you (s)he has a duty of care to her.

A good GP should call her in for an annual check up, well woman clinic, or similar, this should include blood and urine tests which may reveal the cause of her problems.

[Pheath]

Jennybea – you have so much on your plate and far too much for one person to deal with on their own. As nitram says please contact your mum’s GP as soon as you can and explain the situation. Also if you’re able to contact Adult Social Services and speak to the Duty Social Worker they might be able to advise. You definitely need some outside support and soon.

[Helen33]

I would suggest that you begin to log each and every event that you either hear about or experience with your mum. This log can come in very useful at some point in helping others to understand what may be happening with your mum. Don't forget to include dates.

I think it would be very helpful if you could write to your mum's GP requesting that she try to get her patient (your mum) to the surgery by asking her to attend a routine appointment. A well woman check it might be called. Sometimes though people with dementia can come across very well when with authority figures which can be very puzzling as to how they actually are able to do this

I will look forward to hearing how you get on.

Love

[stressed51]

I would make an appointment to see her GP and outline your fears for your mothers health in a letter and ask the GP to get her to come in for a routine appointment. She needn't know that you've set the ball in motion, but it's something you have to do. Keep a record of anything out of the ordinary and ask for a referral to a community psyciatric nurse and help from social services... and keep asking until you get some help. I would certainly contact your local Alzheimers Society who can point you in the right direction for help available in your local area. Good luck and so sorry that you have had to find yourself on this journey, there will be many others who can give you advice, and we are all on this journey with you x

[chris53]

Hello jennybea, sorry you have need for us but glad you have joined, so a warm welcome to you to Talking Point, can only echo what has been said here but if it is a problem getting your mum to the doctors, insist that she has a house visit when you can attend, doctors are well aware that when there may be a dementia issue the person will not go to see them, please make notes on what is happening and make sure the doctor has this before visiting. Please let us know how things are going and that you have had some help sooner rather then later.
Sending you a hug and best wishes
Chris x

[damsel]

Welcome to TP.
No doubt having read the various issues many of us are coping with, you have an idea of the struggles dementia presents, but there must be thousands of people for who after a few teathing troubles, once care and support is in place it settles down into a routine. Be sure to mention your own home situation to her GP. It might encourage them to get the ball rolling.