My Mother in Law, is 90, has Vascular Dementia and lives alone in a bungalow about 10 minutes drive from us. How do we make her aware that she isn't coping with day to day life and would be better moving to nearby sheltered accomodation where her sister, who she is very close to, already has a flat? Over the last few years we've gradually taken over her bills, medication, appointments, shopping etc and now have Power of Attorney for her, she is oblivious to all of this. She has lost so many friends and her social life is non existent, which she says she misses, her 92 yr old sister enjoys a full social life in her accomodation, at the same time having the privacy of her own self contained flat, within a secure building, and carers on 24 hour call. We worry about my Mother in Law, she leaves the door unlocked and goes to sleep in the chair often with the TV blasting out, we walk in and potter around with housework for an hour or so, and she doesn't wake up until we physically wake her. We have many other concerns about her wellbeing, safety and security but she is unable to understand our concerns and thinks she is "coping". We have both now retired and she asks when we are going on a holiday, we haven't had a holiday for many years as we cared for my Mum for 10+ years until I lost her 2 years ago, but we still can't go, as we daren't leave my Mother in Law for more than a few hours, and when we do leave her we worry if she's ok.
How do we make her understand that she is so forgetful, and very vulnerable living alone, and that we're worried about her......is this the right time to keep trying to persuade her to go into sheltered accomodation?