My mum is 87 and previously lived in a development for the over fifties. We moved when my husband retired last year and we asked her what she wanted to do:stay where she was and we would visit and support her; find somewhere similar near to us or for us to find a house with an annexe -she chose the latter.
We spent a lot of time making sure that this was what she wanted and bought a house with a downstairs flat. We didn't realise quite how bad she was and we are in the process of getting her assessed but she denies that there is a problem. She has never been an easy woman and has become even more mean spirited and unpleasant. We have been doing our best but nothing is right and she is getting more unpleasant by the day -verbally abusive to both of us. We can no longer visit our friends so they are coming to see us and when we told her this she went mad and raged at us saying she had always hated them.
She says she is very unhappy and wants to move out - I'm not sure if she will be able to cope. I do all the cooking, cleaning, washing & ironing and would continue. Although it would be great for both of us I don't know if she would be able to cope.