Been a frantic week, 82 year old father in law came out of hospital, after having a stroke, and he had a heart attack/bypass just 4 months ago, so is pretty frail. Not too bad over the stroke now, but absolutely knackered and in dire need of rest, not worry.
Mother in law has Altz, and has fallen over twice - first time broke her hip, hosp for 3 months, and just weeks later, fell over and cracked her pelvis, tho no op possible. We were told 2 days ago that she was being discharged, despite in our opinion, not being at her base level of being able to walk with zimmer so she can go to the commode/loo. We had a meeting with social services, the hospital physio and the sister beside her bed, and a huge row. Luckily I went with Dad in law, because he would've given in as they were so pushy for her to go home and on his own he couldnt have argued with them, but the bottom line is they wont help, other than a care package at home and she needs 24 hour care as far as we're concerned.
The physio and docs say that she is fit to go home, and yet my father in law and I disagree completely, she's shaky, weak, in pain - its etched over her face when they make her walk 30 steps which she could do easily before the second fall. But this is really beside the point, my father in law has said that he cannot be her carer anymore, he's shattered, ill and very very depressed. He's threatened not to come home if she's sent home. His own discharge OT in a different hospital have said that he shouldnt be a carer at the mo, and needs to go easy. They even offered him a care package at home, but decided to take his son and mine's up on the offer to help him shop, cook etc instead of strangers again.
Meanwhile, Social services in the other hospital said that they go on the physio's report on his wife, and that all they can do is offer a care package for home, and no funding towards a home, despite the fact her husband is now ill. They said that they send people in worse states home, physically and with worse altz's (as if that was something to be proud of, heh).
So we've been left no choice other than to find her a home, privately. That we were lucky enough to find on nearby, just one room was available for miles. The cost is huge, over £2k a month.. and of course, savings will go very very quickly.
What happens then? At the moment they have their own savings in separate accounts, but what happens when her money runs out? Do we try and get social services to change their minds, or can we appeal now? Its not just Mum in law that we've got to think of, and they dont seem to care about the dad.
I have no idea what to do next, and it feels like its a ticking time bomb with father in law tbh, I am petrified that he is going to get more ill with the stress.
Please, any advice again be much appreciated.