I'm 56 and gave up work three years ago to look after my wife when she was diagnosed with Alzheimer's, after 5 years of managing what we were told was depression. Like so many other couples, we've been through the range of issues that this awful illness throws at us; we've had the violence, abuse, delusions, sleepless nights; personal care issues, but after three stays in the local hospital in the past twleve months, most if these are under control albeit still liable to flare up at any time. My issue at the moment is that my wife has ceased to accept help and support from anyone else; she won't go to day centres; she won't accept any personal care help and shedoesn't even like our daughters looking after her for more than 45 minutes or so. She has started to take against the house again, and so we spend most of the day outside either walking the local streets or trying to visit somewhere that is within 20 minutes as her limit is an hour at any one place. I feel trapped and daily asking myself if I can do this anymore. I feel ashamed of being weak but at the sametime need some time of my own. Overriding it all though is my belief that if I do give it up, my wife would go down hill at an even quicker rate than we are losing her now. Anyway, the point of this message is to ask anyone who has gone through the stage of agonising over this decision, how do you know when the time is right? Thanks for reading.