Read this.....and be warned.!!!!!!!

[okthought]

An ordinary hospital ward is not an appropriate place for a person with significant dementia. My mother become deranged and paranoid (though the psychiatrist wouldn't agree) on each of two occasions she was admitted to hospital. I'm not sure what hospitals are doing that is so wrong, but I suspect that staff have neither the training nor sufficient time to deal with patients with dementia, especially when accompanied by blindness, as in my mother's case.

[mrs pepperpot]

Oh my God im crying at your pain,,,,im so very very sorry at what has happened to your lovely Dad....This is so painfull for you all , i cant help in any way but i just wanted to say im thinking about you and your family.xxx. Your story has reinforced completely for myself the reason why me and 2 of my brothers are so protective of our lovely gentle mother, we have her living in her cabin on her own land in between my brothers homes, we didnt have time for planning permission for the cabin but we dont care, for our mum theres no other way, we also ask for nothing from anyone, we keep her as far away from the system as is possible for i know that once they get their hands on her theres no hope left, pessimistic perhaps but your dads story is the true story of whats happening to our elderly citizens, wheres the care ???? she has 24 hours care between myself and 2 of my brothers, shes never alone....i hope something good happens for you soon.xxx

[handyjack]

Very few (if any ) NHS hospitals are actually set up to deal with dementia. They tend to put elderly people (whatever they are suffering from) onto the geriatric wards, where nursing staff just don't know the first thing about the special needs of dementia sufferers. Our local "super hospital", has only just set up a special dementia ward (for sufferers who need operations , or hospitalisation for a short time) and the hospital has been open now for 3 or 4 years (such is the speed of progress within the NHS) They should have had a specialised dementia ward when it was built. They are now training nurses in dementia care. (probably more how to fill in the forms correctly though, rather than actual care).
Your post is a real eye opener to the basic lack of care in the NHS for dementia sufferers everywhere.

[Mun]

handy jack,
My sentiments exactly And I've been in the mire of the NHS for 35 years !!

Val x

[flowerpot]

My heart goes out to you and yours. It's appalling how our elderly relatives are treated in hospital. With hindsight I can see all the mistakes that were made with my Dad. They forced a feeding tube down his throat five times there are plenty of us in the family and we worked a rota system so that he was never alone apart from overnight and even then I sometimes sat in the chair watching over him all night. It was appalling to see how many never got anything to eat or drink for hours especially the ones that didn't get many visitors.

We had open visiting which a lot of the nurses didn't like and made life hell for us. They had Dad in a room of his own but every now and then they would move him on to the main ward which totally confused him and they tried to stop us being there all the time but that didn't work as we just ignored them and got on looking after Dad. Which in itself is appalling we shouldn't have had to spend all that time looking after him when there was people getting paid to do so.........

Sorry for the rant but you've just brought it all back to me and it makes me so angry that nearly two years on nothing has changed in any of our hospitals........I think I'll join you in Parliament and maybe together we can get this bloody mess sorted out. After all it's not rocket science millions of us every day look after our elderly relatives without any harm coming to them.

This is why our GP and nurses know that we don't want MiL to go into hospital under any circumstances.....

Take care and I'm thinking of you xxxx

[handyjack]

Our local hospital has protected mealtimes, where relatives and visitors are/were not allowed. Some dementia patients were left to feed themselves (when some could not). Meals were taken away, with "Oh I see your not hungry today." comments and similar with drinks. They now have volunteers who go in specifically at mealtimes to help
One resident from our home was taken into hospital. The doctor diagnosed "dehydration" The resident was kept in hospital for one week then returned to our home. Within an hour the resident had collapsed and was taken back. Another doctor diagnosed "dehydration." (the residents discharge notes were sent back with her too, but obviously the doctor was too busy to read these)
How can someone be diagnosed without running tests is beyond me. Turned out the resident had suffered a TIA and also had a a UTI. Neither of which were picked up by the medical staff at the first time of admission.

[jeany123]

When our loved ones go into hospital we are told "they are in the best place " but from my own experience and reading on here this is far from the truth

[flowerpot]

The hospital where my Dad was had protected meal times too. It makes you wonder who the protection is for The whole thing makes me so mad It's a disgrace the way elderly people are treated in hospitals.

[milomia]

Dad is back in the same Hospital, still waiting to be seen by psych..???? But they are aware of what we are implying happened to him....all of a sudden the terminology has changed....asking how he was this morning I was told he had been a bit "agitated" when they had tried to wash him ( still just dirtying himself all over )......"oh, agitated, I said , so not trying to punch and kick you and swearing"...."Er, well yes he was, and we were unable to attend to him"....Strange I said, on the other ward the nurses described that as downright violent......is this a new thing of playing it down then???...I will swing for someone tomorrow...watch this space.

[Onlyme]

Dad is back in the same Hospital, still waiting to be seen by psych..???? But they are aware of what we are implying happened to him....all of a sudden the terminology has changed....asking how he was this morning I was told he had been a bit "agitated" when they had tried to wash him ( still just dirtying himself all over )......"oh, agitated, I said , so not trying to punch and kick you and swearing"...."Er, well yes he was, and we were unable to attend to him"....Strange I said, on the other ward the nurses described that as downright violent......is this a new thing of playing it down then???...I will swing for someone tomorrow...watch this space.

This sounds like they are now using proper dementia termswhich seem to be used for those suffering. Agitated usually means that Mum is screaming fit to bust. The staff will leave her 10 minutes and then try again to sort out her personal needs. She is double incontinent and is high risk for bed sores.

I really hope your Dad gets the care he needs and that you manage to get an answer to what the hell went on.

[Taz]

I wish I had a pound for every time, over the past three months or so, since Dad broke his hips that I had been told that what had happened to him after going into hospital 'was an isolated incident.....' I would be wealthy now.
Your description is very similar to what happened to Dad.......no-one seems to care, not even PALS at our hospital......so we fight on to get answers but it's like getting blood out of a stone.
Shocking

[Witzend]

When our loved ones go into hospital we are told "they are in the best place " but from my own experience and reading on here this is far from the truth

Just to give the other side, my mother broke her hip a couple of years ago and went into an ordinary orthopaedic ward. I was very concerned since her dementia was pretty bad by then (she was over 90) and could be stroppy to say the least. However the staff were fantastic with her and she made a good and pretty rapid recovery.

[milomia]

This has effected my health more than I at first realised...can't sleep and can't eat...what happened to my Dad is flashing through my mind constantly....nightmare.
We will see what and if SS are going to do about things tomorrow...we are going to PALS too...we need to talk to the Psych team to ask for some guidance to get him assessed properly...then we will be hitting the Papers...and Mr Cameron will be hearing from us too....This is everything that is wrong with this country...the NHS, and people who "at the top" will not be having a single nights stay in an NHS ward in their lives, so how the hell would they know what it's like. We trusted them we thought they knew what they were doing.....they have fallen so short of the mark it is scary...and it is our DAD....they are going to have to revise the way they "care" ( and I use that term loosely) for the Elderly and especially Dementia pateints in our Hospitals. Remember..." where you are, I once was....where I am, you will be"..Lets see what my very strong Sister and I can achieve...we don't work, we have good communication skills, we have been in Sales and Promotions all our lives ...and hey what the hell...they think they can do this to our beloved Parents....lets fight back a bit and see where it gets us...I'm not adverse to speaking my mind and upsetting people........you might hear about me in Parliamant yet.

[Magsie]

Good luck today - I'll be thinking of you and supporting you all the way.

Magsie

[sad girl]

Milomia - WOW what a catalogue of events you and your poor dad have suffered....isn't it disgusting the way the elderly are treated by professional people!

I am so glad you have the strength and fight in you to go all the way to the papers and No.10. I wish you and your sister lots of luck and really hope you get the outrageous treatment brought to ahead.

I am still a believer that nurses don't really need a degree to start their training, they need compassion and empathy which sadly is lacking.

Good luck and give em hell