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Thread: IF I was asked

  1. #1
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    IF I was asked

    If anybody were around to ask me how I cope with looking after my wife who has moderate alzheimers, I would have to honestly say I do not, I tolerate it for the sake of my wife, I do cope but this is how you feel on a daily basis,
     

  2. #2
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    Beautiffully put - your post has struck a cord with me. x
     

  3. #3
    I know what you mean, I just muddle through and do the best I can but don't feel as though I am coping,


    Jeany
     

  4. #4
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    It's a bit like becoming a parent for the very first time. It doesn't come with an instruction manual - yet here you are, feeling totally responsible for this person's care & welfare. And you haven't a clue what to do, but somehow, taking each day and each new wrinkle (most of them yours acquired through stress!) you learn and time passes with you both still surviving, somehow. That's how I fell about it anyway.
     

  5. #5
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    Hi Allthings,

    I think also that "coping" is where it still looks ok to the outside world - where all looks as though it is running along the normal channels.

    As to whether it means there is anything further than keeping up appearances and completing the daily tasks of washing, dressing, eating, domestic chores etc....

    Have you got rid of your cold yet? There seem to have been some really nasty bugs around which have left people either with a filthy cough, or under par for weeks afterwards. That won't be helping you either; managing someone else's life when all you want to do is just sleep or rest is a big ask.

    It is only now that I'm in the "after" stage that I realise just how run down I had become, and how worried and tired I was all the time just trying to keep those plates spinning. I was "coping", but there wasn't anything much else in my life. There aren't any easy answers, but perhaps I was trying to do too much and should have got more help in hindsight....

    Look after yourself xxx
     

  6. #6

    Hello allthings

    I`m sure you cope better than you give yourself credit for.

    Many carers don`t see how brilliant they are because they are too tired and stressed to be able to step back and look objectively at their own lives and how they live.

    It is only now my husband is in residential care, I read posts from others still in the thick of 24/7 caring and wonder how I managed it.

    Sylvia

    Former Carer and Volunteer Moderator .

    I cried because I had no shoes until I met a man who had no feet

    About me
     

  7. #7
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    thanks for all the replies, thanks the cold has gone but not totally, nicoise, still sniffling it starting to annoy me, I have always wanted to play the guitar so have booked some lessons, also i am a member of a running club but it has been a struggle recently my running has been below par but have picked up this week and feeling more optimistic, just trying to get into a routine i am happy with and try to settle down a bit, not been able to do that since my wifes diagnosis last august.I have to get my head round that it could be many years of caring, or possible not. no one knows the future or wants to know, but i think the key is to be positive all the time and ignore all the negative things that come into your head and work very hard to make every day a happy one
     

 

 

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