I am having an all time low day today. It seems as though mam's gone from great to nightmare in a week. I cant believe what's happening at the moment, mam's gone from being able bodied, laughing, joking talking clearley to incontenant in the space of a week. My dad is mam's main carer and he really cant take anymore, I think its time for mam to go into care but i know dad doesn't want this but i'm so scared of losing him, he has done an amazing job looking after mam for the past 4 years, full time with sometimes little or no support. I spoke to the CPN today and we think that mam may have picked up a bug which is possibly why the incontinance has started, we took samples today and await the results, i dont know wether to wait for the results before making final decisions i just dont know what to do, the thought of mam going into a home scares the life out of me, she's 58 years old!!! its so unfair, i wish i could talk to her and ask her what she wants, that sounds silly because i know for a fact she wouldnt want to go into care but she wouldnt want to be putting my dad thorugh all this either, catch 22, vicious circle, double ended sword, this situation is all of theese rolled into one.