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  1. #1
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    Funeral Expenses, what happens if family cant pay

    I wanted some advice, unfortunately my Dad never bothered to take out any insurance. And myself and husband just about manage to cover our bills. He is only one working so we cant claim any benefits, as without these benefits they wont help with it.

    My Dad is doing ok in the care home but I do worry about when his time comes that I just don't have the money to pay for it all. I am an only child as well which makes it worse so there will be no one to turn to for financial help towards it. Dads family don't seem to want to know, his brother is quite well of I think, but he does not want to know really. He knows I wont have to money but he doesn't seem to care really.

    Plus I have health issues myself as well on top. I just dont get any support at all from the family. To be honest with you all, if it wasnt for my husband, I would not have anyone at all to turn to. I tried ages ago to discuss the issue of Dad and funeral expenses and uncle wasnt interested. Because they dont want any responsibility of everything. Uncle just said there will be people there. not family "people" Charming.

    Anyways, if anyone can give advice on funeral subjects when person left has no money to pay for this, what happens then? I was told council only pay if there are no family.

    Help appreciated thanks.
     

  2. #2
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    fund

    If you are on low income you may be able to get a Funeral Payment from the Social Fund. http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/MoneyTax...ed/DG_10018660
    All the best
    Pixy
     

  3. #3
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    Depending on your dad's estate he could get the funeral payment.

    It has to be worth talking to them, the worst they can say is no, and at best they can solve your worries xxx
     

  4. #4
    ladywriter, I think you'll be able to resolve these issues when the time comes.

    Right now, I think you should focus on enjoying the time you have left with your father.
    Joanne
    Carer and Volunteer Moderator
    When you've seen one person with Alzheimer's, you've seen one person with Alzheimer's
     

  5. #5
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    Ladywriter,
    I've just been through this with a close relative who was penniless.

    If there are no close relatives (as in ones who have as close a relationship with your dad and are brothers or sisters or daughters or sons or a wife) then if you end up taking on responsibility for organising the funeral, your situation will be assessed by SS to see if you are eligible for some money from the social fund. Someone else has already given you a link to the information.

    It works like this - If you get certain benefits then that means you get a certain amount from the social fund to pay for the funeral (there is a cap on the amount so it does mean that you won't be able to pick the most expensive things etc).

    Don't worry - it's not as difficult as it sounds.

    When it gets to this point the funeral directors are generally very clued up on this and will help you with what to do. That's what they are for.
    I hope this may put your mind at rest that there may be some help available when the time comes.
    Take care
    Feezee
     

  6. #6
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    Dad has nothing

    Quote Originally Posted by scared daughter View Post
    Depending on your dad's estate he could get the funeral payment.

    It has to be worth talking to them, the worst they can say is no, and at best they can solve your worries xxx
    Hi I should have explained. Dad is in care home and previously he lived in a council house and only had his pension. Nothing else. No assets and no money savings.
     

  7. #7
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    thanks

    Quote Originally Posted by Feezee View Post
    Ladywriter,
    I've just been through this with a close relative who was penniless.

    If there are no close relatives (as in ones who have as close a relationship with your dad and are brothers or sisters or daughters or sons or a wife) then if you end up taking on responsibility for organising the funeral, your situation will be assessed by SS to see if you are eligible for some money from the social fund. Someone else has already given you a link to the information.

    It works like this - If you get certain benefits then that means you get a certain amount from the social fund to pay for the funeral (there is a cap on the amount so it does mean that you won't be able to pick the most expensive things etc).

    Don't worry - it's not as difficult as it sounds.

    When it gets to this point the funeral directors are generally very clued up on this and will help you with what to do. That's what they are for.
    I hope this may put your mind at rest that there may be some help available when the time comes.
    Take care
    Feezee
    Thanks for your help, My husband works ft and we cant get any benefits. As you said, I guess just wait and see.
     

  8. #8
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    I understand what you say

    Quote Originally Posted by Canadian Joanne View Post
    ladywriter, I think you'll be able to resolve these issues when the time comes.

    Right now, I think you should focus on enjoying the time you have left with your father.
    I understand what you say and many would agree with you, but I just worry about this stuff to be honest and we are poor.
     

  9. #9
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    Working Tax Credits and Tax Credits

    We do get Tax Credits, but on the benefits page it states Working Tax Credits.

    Are they the same thing?
     

  10. #10
    Dear Ladywriter,

    I'm afraid I don't know very much on this subject at all, but simply wanted to say that I'm so sorry you are worrying. I'm a worrier too and when life is looking bleak and is beyond your control, maybe focusing on something we can control helps a little.

    It certainly did last year when I was losing my dad. I planned ahead, I researched and I filed all my information neatly away in my head so that I didn't have to think about it at the time I'd be losing him. I had the feeling I'd be too grief-stricken to think about details etc. when the time came. And when the time did come, I was relieved to be able to pull out the filed information from my mind and use less energy at a time I needed to grieve.

    So ask away, and find out what you need to know now. Then you'll be clear on what to do later. I think it's a coping mechanism in the face of sadness, for some. I never felt I spent less time with dad because of it. But I was free to cry over him, instead of being on the phone talking to strangers & asking questions, at the point I should be left alone.

    Hope you get some answers, and my sincere sympathy for your situation.
    Annie x x

     

  11. #11
    Dear Ladywriter,

    Sorry that I have no direct advice. If you are a worrier, could it help if you visited an undertaker to discuss your father's situation and your part in it? It might put your mind a little at rest and at the same time gives you the opportunity of thinking things through rather than rushing when the time comes.

    The local Citizens' Advice Bureau has leaflets "What to do when someone dies" - you might google it too.

    Thinking of you and hoping you find most answers helpful and very soon.

    Martina
    MARTINA
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    POST TENEBRAS LUX - after Darkness there shall be Light
    Cared for my Cousin with 13 years of Alzheimer's of which 8 years of diagnosed Posterior Cortical Atrophy (PCA) - who died 26.01.2012
    http://www.alzheimers.org.uk/factsheet/135 /// To me a great description of PCA/Benson http://www.orpha.net/data/patho/GB/uk-Benson.pdf
    PCA SUPPORT GROUP www.pcasupport.ucl.ac.uk
    SKYPE username: Metamorphosis of a Family
     

  12. #12
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    I would suggest that you visit your local undertaker, and ask their advice. They will have dealt with it all before, burying people with all sorts of financial backgrounds. It might just set your mind at rest.

    Why not ask the Alzheimers society about the possibility of donating the body for medical research? Maybe that option would be at no cost, and would be of great benefit for future generations of dementia sufferers.

    Margaret
     

  13. #13
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    I have done some digging and I suggest you read about form SF2000 which is an application to the Social Fund for a funeral payment. Copy is here: http://www.dwp.gov.uk/advisers/claim...f200_print.pdf

    There are very strict rules about who can and who cannot receive a funeral payment. A funeral payment MAY be made if you take responsibility for arranging the funeral and you qualify in accordance with the provisions clearly stated on the SF2000 form. If is important to note however that the starting point is a legal one and that is, if you enter into any agreement with an undertaker then it states that you are liable to pay the undertaker for the funeral. You may however apply for a funeral payment to offset SOME of the expenses. It does say that if your intention is to ask for a payment that you inform the undertaker, presumably so that they can help you keep your expenses to a minimum. If you aren't able to pay the undertaker THEN apply for the funeral payment you might also need the agreement of the undertaker to wait for payment until the funeral payment is received. I guess the question is - what do you do if there is a considerable shortfall after any funeral payment has been made???

    From what I have gleened, if you do not make arrangements (you're not obliged to of course) then the local council will have to arrange for a basic funeral. This is a minimal affair with "no frills" etc. Every council is different about what it will pay for and how much, so it might be worth investigating that also.

    In view of the above, you may wish to read the form and make enquiries in order to give yourself peace of mind. Like most government forms they are not very easy to understand for example - it says you may get costs for hearse and mourners car if the journey is over 50 miles. I don't understand this statement - eg who pays if it is under 50 miles???

    The choices would therefore seem to be (a) make arrangements for the funeral then apply for a funeral payment knowing that you are liable for all the costs because you made the contract with the undertaker and live in hope that some of the costs are offset if you apply for, and receive, a funeral payment from the Social Fund, OR (b) stand back and don't offer to make the arrangements and let the local authority step in and take responsibility.

    Hope this helps

    Fiona
     

  14. #14
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    thanks for your advice and all of you

    Thank you for all your advice and the last post as well which was very helpful. I will try and look into everything. and there is nothing worse then being left with everything at the actual time it happens when you cant think straight anyway, I have seen so many in a mess when their loved one dies and they cant think straight or anything. When my Mum died suddenly my Dad was left to pick up the bill. I dont know what happened cause I was only a child. I think that the council paid for it actually cause Dad I dont think had the money to. And she was not insured either.

    I would just like all to know that my Dad had an operation today and he is fine back at the care home, was for pace maker, plus last night I broke my toe on the door and spent it up the hospital. It will take 4-6wks to repair now and will have to have treatment on it been told. Oh well.
     

  15. #15
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    Oh poor you. I hope the toe heals soon.
    Izzy
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    'The best things in life are nearest: Breath in your nostrils, light in your eyes, flowers at your feet, duties at your hand, the path of right just before you. Then do not grasp at the stars, but do life's plain, common work as it comes, certain that daily duties and daily bread are the sweetest things in life.'
    Robert Louis Stevenson
     

 

 

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