View RSS Feed

Lynrogers

Visit to Dad 8 December 09

Rate this Entry
Today The Alzheimer's Society were holding a carol concert in the chapel at the British Legion Home where Dad lives. There was also refreshments and a buffet being held afterwards. I had arranged to take Dad. I arrived at about 1.30pm. He had forgotten what we were doing but said he was still happy to go along. I could tell he wasn't in the best of humours. The chapel is very small but it is a lovely atmosphere. The lay preacher had a nativity set which had been knitted by a student of hers some years ago. She gave members of the congregation each a different figure as part of the nativity scene. She gave Dad a Shepherd. Unfortunately he wasn't impressed. When the time came to put the shepherd on the nativity scene Dad wouldn't take it to the front. I took it up and said to him what a good idea it was but he said he thought it was a bit childish Mmm! Dad didn't rate the singing either! Afterwards we went into the hall nextdoor for some refreshments but Dad was not very interested and not very talkative. I often find things I think Dad will really enjoy he simply doesn't and other times I worry something may not push his buttons and it does. I tried my best to chivvy Dad along but eventually he made it quite clear he wanted to go home so off we went. I thought it was a lovely way to spend an afternoon and felt quite Christmassy! Dad did say he remembered going to the chapel for a funeral, which he had. I wondered afterwards if that was what was on his mind.

Submit "Visit to Dad 8 December 09" to Digg Submit "Visit to Dad 8 December 09" to del.icio.us Submit "Visit to Dad 8 December 09" to StumbleUpon Submit "Visit to Dad 8 December 09" to Google

Categories
Uncategorized

Comments

  1. mybiggles's Avatar
    How on earth do you cope with trying to do the right thing for your Dad - and it all goes pear shaped?.In reading your Blog I feel very humble about the attempts I have made to "do the right thing " for my Mother - and the complete sense of rejection I feel when she really thinks I could do better!
    Thank you for your story- it has spurred me on to try a bit harder to get it right - to find the bits of Jigsaw in Mothers mind that might just fit!
  2. Lynrogers's Avatar
    Don't be humbled or dissolutioned. In my Dads eyes I still do very little right. It has taken time, trial and error and, I can assure you, many tears to be able to deal with it more philosophically. I used to do many things for Dad that I thought he would like rather than think about what he would like to do. Often what he wants to do is much more simple than I thought. However, even the simple things like going to the Carol Concert can back fire. The key is not to take any rejection personally and keep smiling through it. Next time will be better. Today I shall take him for tea in town which I have discovered he enjoys above most things. We often do this and I sometimes feel a change would be good but with someone with dementia the familiar usually works best. Plus the fact he can't remember he has been so many times! If you can find something your Mum really likes to do and it hits her buttons stick with it the results can be really rewarding.