Sharon Waugh

My sympathy! I also feel this way. Guilty if I don't visit mum, but when I do it makes me miserable because she always complains and wants to go home, yet staff say she is happy 90 per cent of the time- which is better than when she was at home. At least I know she is safe and well cared for, but the guilt feelings are still there..... I guess that's the way it is for dutiful daughters!

Looks like we are both in the same boat. I think the only solution is to take one day at a time and definately have some ME time out. A friend said to me that with Alzheimers Disease, you cannot win, and "you are damned if you do, and damned if you don't. " You cannot do everything, be everywhere, and please everyone. He had the same experiences as us with his mother several years ago. All you can do is the best you can and naturally the most common emotion seems to be guilt with everyone who has a loved one with this problem. It would be nice to get some peace of mind and I hope your get some good days that you can enjoy to the full. When the going gets tough.. the tough get going. Keep your chin up and spoil yourself a little. I have had some ME time today and have done some things I love, just for ME.. it really really helps. X